


When You Can't Feel Your Feet Anymore, You Keep Marching On

by AwkwardDuckProducktions



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Being a clone sucks, Boil needs a hug, CC-2224 | Cody Needs a Hug, CC-2224 | Cody is a Good Bro, CT-7567 | Rex Needs a Hug, Cody is a terrible but effective therapist, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Umbara Arc (Star Wars), Rex has anxiety, Suicidal Thoughts, always had it and only has gotten worse, canon said 'that sure was wild' and everyone was like 'UMM!'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:47:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29451789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwkwardDuckProducktions/pseuds/AwkwardDuckProducktions
Summary: Cody was running before his datapad even but the floor. Racing down the halls of the Negotiator, he cursed the Force. He cursed little and big gods alike. He cursed the Senate that pulled him away momentarily from his battalion. He cursed the muscles in his legs and the heart in his ears. He cursed himself most of all.Cody was running, a blur of yellow, blue and white in the corner of his eyes as he raced by. No one dared try to stop him. No one dared try to stand in his way.
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex
Comments: 17
Kudos: 66





	When You Can't Feel Your Feet Anymore, You Keep Marching On

Cody was running before his datapad even but the floor. Racing down the halls of the  _ Negotiator,  _ he cursed the Force. He cursed little and big gods alike. He cursed the Senate that pulled him away momentarily from his battalion. He cursed the muscles in his legs and the heart in his ears. He cursed himself most of all.

Cody was running, a blur of yellow, blue and white in the corner of his eyes as he raced by. No one dared try to stop him. No one dared try to stand in his way. His general could barely eak out a word before he left, not one of command but as a friend to another. "Go." Kenobi knew what was at risk.

Cody remembered back on Kamino, when Rex first had crossed Cody's radar. He was in _ his  _ hiding spot. Instincts took over then, just as it did now. One of the few things that never changed about Rex, he was always stealing Cody's spot. Which is how he managed to find him so quickly, tucked away behind crates. His hands laced on top of hunched neck, braced for impact. Fitting himself impossibly small, begging the universe to let him disappear.

But Cody refused to let that happen.

" _ Rex'ika _ ," Cody moved slowly, inch by slow inch closer until his hand rested on top of Rex's.

A start stole the young captain's breath, red laced eyes bleary looked up at Cody. Words died on Rex's lips, all that came out were a few lost tears and a croak from deep within.

"Let's go to my office, okay?" It wasn't a command. There was too much uncertainty in Cody's voice for him to be a commander right now. That at any moment, the universe might listen to Rex for once and take him away.

But Rex nodded, carefully unfolding himself and letting Cody help him to his feet. One hand holding Rex's helmet and the other wrapped protectively around his shoulders, Cody led him out of the storage room to his room, cursing everything that led them to  _ here _ along the way. 

"Let's get your armor off." He wasn't asking, behind his plea of a smile, an anger boiled in Cody. But that wasn't needed right now. Now, Rex needed him to not be Marshal Commander Cody. Rex needed the same toothy Cody that told the Kamonions that Rex was "blond, not braindead." The Cody that refused to let that- or him- go. "May I help you with that?"

"I-" Words suffocated him, refused to dislodge themselves from his throat. He sat on Cody's bed, dumbfounded and swaying. If Rex had any tears- any fight- in him, all reserves were being used to simply be alive.

"Can you unlock it if you want my help?" Cody tried his best to keep it a question. To give Rex the option to say no. To not simply give orders for good soldiers to follow.

Rex pressed the buttons and the magnetic locks disengaged.

"Thank you." It was as much for Rex as it was for Cody. Thousands of brothers under their care, knowing deep down they cannot save them all, only for someone like Krell to exist.

Cody took his time removing Rex's armor, narrating each part though the two knew it by rote. Rex didn't need any more surprises, already teetering on a familiar edge.

From the calf guards to his boot.

His kneepads to his gloves.

His elbow pads to forearm guards.

_ This is how we show our love. _

Cody taught Rex that rhyme, just as Wolffe had taught him. For a brief moment, he dared to look up at Rex, to see anything in his eyes. He regretted it immediately when he only saw death reflected back. When only his belt, groin and thigh pieces remained, Cody gathered the dirty armor and set them away. Temptation of locking them up was short-lived yet Cody mourned it still. At least then no one would dare try to scrub it clean.

"I'm sorry."

Cody shouldn't have been that surprised that those were Rex's first words. He was every bit still the small cadet Cody grew fond of. The shuddering of his breath didn't surprise him either. Nor did the sudden renewed tears.

"I killed- I killed Waxer. I'm sorry."

It was when his own heart stopped that made Cody freeze.

"You didn't kill him." It was final. Certain. Cody cursed himself for putting on much too bravado.

"I pulled the  _ kriffing _ trigger!" Rex fought back lost in gasping sobs and memories.

"You were tricked." Cody couldn't entertain the idea of the situation being switched, Waxer had always been better at these sorts of things.

"I should have- I should-"

"-what? Have known?" Cody moved to the dresser and pulled out sleepwear for Rex to borrow. "That's kinda a key element in getting tricked, you not knowing." He forced his lungs to keep breathing. To keep up the act that Cody wasn't falling apart on the inside. "No one can blame you for things you didn't have control over. That's the definition of straight up  _ karkary _ ."

"Is that what you're going to tell Boil?" Rex bitterly bit back. For a second, Cody's vision went white. He forced himself to breathe deeply until the vague deja vu retreated a little.

"Are you trying to make me hate you?" Cody questioned, not with anger or vengeance, just reassuring an assumption.

"Would make leaving easier." It wasn't a yes. Sure as  _ kriff _ wasn't a no.

“Force, is that what I sounded like after ‘Resistance training?’ I need to apologize to Wolffe and Fox.” A facade of a smirk crossed his face when he shook his head before adding “I hope you’re content to know I have to apologize to our  _ ori’vode _ .”

“Of course I’m not  _ karking  _ content with this! Why are you acting like this! I killed your lieutenant!” What little fight he had left bursted from Rex, his chest ached from where its claws dug in to climb. And all Cody did was look at him from across the room with wide brown eyes.

“Because I am your older brother before I am a commander.” His delicate facade shattered under the truth. "I can't do anything about this stupid war. I can't do anything about bad generals." With eyes that burned, Cody whispered his plea. "But I can do something about you."

"Yeah putting a blaster to my head." Rex regretted the words slipped out. Half apologies caught on his lips as he watched Cody eased back into every bit of the angry possessive cadet he once was.

"Get in the sonic."

* * *

**_C-Cody:_ ** _ Boil? _

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ Tell Rex I don't blame him. _

**_C-Cody:_ ** _ Sorry I'm not there. _

Thirty minutes.

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ I know you. Rex is your pride and joy. _

Five minutes.

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ You did a good job with that one. Better he feel guilt than nothing. _

Twelve minutes.

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ We'll figure out everything later, just get through the night. Both of you. I am currently with Stitches and Screech so don't worry about me. _

**_C-Cody:_ ** _ I'm still going to but knowing Screech is there to guilt you helps. _

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ He's more of a nightmare than Knockout, just hides it better. _

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ No planning tonight. Not unless it'll help Rex. We'll figure out everything at midmeal tomorrow. Or later. Just whenever we wake up. _

**_C-Cody:_ ** _ I hope I've made it clear that you are irreplaceable. _

**_L-Boil:_ ** _ You have many times. _

Cody turned off his comm when the door to the refresher opened, revealing a clean Rex wearing sleeping greys and a distant look Cody knew well. He offered a smile as he got up and took Rex's hand in his. Never letting it falter nor grow as he guided Rex to sit on his bed, only when Rex started blankly at the offered canteen did his trying smile fall.

"You gotta drink,  _ Rex'ika _ ."

But Rex just shook his head.

"Please?" Cody didn't mean to let it sound like a whimper, but it was just enough to push Rex over the edge as tears and sobs spilled from him in a rush to escape. He tried to fold into himself, but Cody wrapped his arms around him so he had no choice but to let Cody in and pull him close. He hated the sound, the broken gasps, but Cody learned long ago it was better he cried. Just as Boil said, better he felt something than nothing.

And just as years ago, Cody arranged them so they were lying down. Rex accepted the change, pressing face into Cody's neck. Only when Rex squeezed tighter, a promise that he was going to stay, did Cody felt the tears gathering in his eyes. 

They would get through the night.

They will plan tomorrow.

And they would continue marching on.

  
  



End file.
